As interests go, taking photos of signs at golf courses is perhaps odd, but so be it. In my world, humor and interest are in the eye of the beholder. Sometimes it’s not humor or interest, though; sometimes it’s an appreciation for the manner in which people accept that golfers will do silly things and it is best to be prim and proper, not rude, in snapping senses back in order.
For instance, a brilliant links in Scotland called Dunbar has a sign that made me smile: “We advise all golfers not to retrieve golf balls from the beach at this hole.”
How polite. If it were an American course, the sign would have blared, “Stay out,” or maybe “No trespassing,” or even “Violators will be prosecuted.” Or something along those lines. But the Scots have a deep reverence for golf and golfers, and so the attitude is, why browbeat them?
Why not gently remind them to be sensible?
At another Scottish course that tickled my fancy, a sign had in big, bold, red letters a rather loud, though respectful, pronouncement.
“Walkers, please read this.” The “please” warmed my heart. It would have been a more jarring warning here in the U.S., maybe something along the lines of “Police take notice.” But even more than that, what intrigued me is how it went on to remind walkers that they were required to “stand and give golfers priority” by something called the Land Reforms Act of 2003.
How brilliant, telling people that golfers have priority. We all know this to be as it should be, but to actually post that is marvelous. It validates my passion for signs, for studying them, for photographing them, even if most of them simply collect dust in my iPhone library.
Occasionally, they get dusted off, like the ones accompanying this story.
To know when you’re on the island of Kaua’i, for instance, that you can do one-stop shopping for snorkel gear and rental golf clubs is quite comforting. There’s yin and yang that you should be seeking in your life, to find that much-needed layer of philosophical harmony. But my guess is, snorkeling and golfing would get you to the same place without the emotional tug of war.
Thus was my walk along the beach halted for a photo.
As for the sign that jumped out at me at a public course on the island of Kaua’i called Kiahuna Golf Club, the one at the fourth hole – the hole was called Pololei lo’a; translation being “accurate” – was so logical it made me laugh. Then came the sign that commanded your attention.
“NOTICE” was in a big point size, all caps, then came the subhead: “You, the golfer, are responsible for the consequences of the ball you hit.”
Bravo was the first thought that came to mind, because the simplest reminders in golf are often the most ignored.
It’s a microcosm of life, in some ways, because the simplest things that should guide our lives – be respectful, be thankful, be kind – are those actions that we seemingly have left out of our daily routines.
Sad.
Taking responsibility of your golf ball is not that difficult; all that is demanded of you is a measure of courtesy. Yell “fore” – and emphatically – should it be an errant shot. Enter the bunker properly – that would be the low side – should your ball be in the sand.
Accept that the bad shot is in a thankless predicament because you hit it there, not because the ground was bad (so don’t gouge the turf) or the club was at fault (so don’t throw it) or the official didn’t make a ruling that you approved of (my guess is, he or she is right).
That sign at Kiahuna, like the sign at Dunbar or the sign in a store window in St. Andrews – “To golf or not to golf . . . what a silly question” – or the sign on a stone chair at Marion Hollins’ gravesite – Visionary golf course architect & pioneer of the game – or the inscription on the Augusta National sun dial – “Slow Back, Time Right.” All of them, so timeless.
So, too, the “Champion Golfer of the Year” notice that adorns the Open Championship scoreboard minutes after the Claret Jug is clinched. Or the one at Lundin Links in Scotland that warns walkers, “Golf in progress.” And, of course, the plaque at Cypress Point No. 17 tee that asks you to embrace reality and look around to “admire the beautiful view, count our blessings.”
Signs. Love ‘em.
But if we were to add another sign, let’s start by posting this where applicable:
“We’re playing the ball down. It’s a major championship.”
And with that, we’re signing off for the week.
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